“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” (Genesis 2:24 KJV)
Two Become One: The Art of Cleaving in Marriage
The marriage covenant between a man and a woman is a highly esteemed bond and a precious union in the eyes of God. It is where two individual wills unite as one. Guided by the Holy Spirit, you cleave to one another to build a strong and lasting marriage. Together, you create a new family unit, independent of your parents. While you still involve them in your lives and honor and respect them, your marriage establishes a separate family unit.
To cleave means to weld together, to adhere. The unity in marriage is unique—a special blessing that can only be attained by two becoming one within the sacred bond of marriage. No other relationship on earth is called to such unity, not even the deep bonds between parents and children, siblings, or lifelong friends. It means holding fast to one another through life’s challenges and joys, creating a resilient bond together through the Holy Spirit that withstands the test of time.
Marriage is a Marathon, Not a Sprint: How to Keep Going
A great marriage doesn’t just happen. A ring and a piece of paper do not make a marriage. A successful marriage is a daily work that must be built up and nourished. Intimacy involves sharing your innermost thoughts, desires, and dreams, and being able to be vulnerable and feel safe.
I am convinced that a successful marriage must have faith in God as its foundation. Why? Because agreeing that God must always be first in every aspect of the marriage ensures you both start on common ground. There is immense power in agreement, according to the Word of God. A married couple must be free to worship, pray, and share the Word of God together. Their spiritual union provides empowering love.
One key to a strong marriage is recognizing and meeting each other’s basic needs. God created us to complete, not compete with, one another. Communication, trust, and love are the critical cornerstones, based on Biblical principles, that support a shared life. As you grow together in Christ, you learn to appreciate each other’s strengths and support each other to overcome weaknesses. With the Holy Spirit as your anchor, you foster a partnership with Jesus at the center, enriching both of your lives.
Covenant vs. Contract: Why Marriage is More Than a Legal Agreement
Marriage is not only a commitment; it is a covenant with God. It is the promise to remain with the other person for the rest of your life, no matter if your spouse is rich, poor, healthy, sick, overweight, underweight, or even boring. A Christian marriage should endure through every circumstance, including fights, anger, devastation, disaster, depression, bitterness, addiction, and loneliness.
Marriage should never be entered into with the idea that divorce is an option—not even as a last resort. The Bible tells us that through God all things are possible (Luke 18:27 KJV), and this certainly includes marriage. If a couple decides from the beginning to stay committed and put God first, divorce will not be the inevitable solution to a miserable situation.
As couples face the trials and tribulations of life, they are reminded of the profound strength that comes from their shared faith in Jesus Christ and commitment to the sacred covenant of marriage. Christian marriage calls on both partners to seek solace and guidance from their spiritual beliefs, recognizing that their union is not just a partnership but also a reflection of God’s love. By placing God at the center of their relationship, couples gain access to a source of wisdom and resilience to navigate even the most turbulent times.
In difficult moments, we can always adhere to the wisdom to stop, pause, and pray. Precious friend when hardships arise, take quiet time to walk in nature with thoughtful prayer, seeking God’s guidance, rather than fleeing from challenging circumstances. If you have wandered from this path, humbly repent and seek God’s assistance. Embrace the lessons learned, allowing the Almighty to mold you into a more loving spouse.
Understanding Your Mate: The Key to a Balanced Marriage
Dr. Willard Harley Jr. has identified five basic needs men expect their wives to fulfill, and five basic needs women expect their husbands to meet.
For Men
1.) Sexual fulfillment
2.) Recreational companionship
3.) An attractive spouse
4.) Domestic support
5.) Admiration
For Women
1.) Affection
2.) Conversation
3.) Honesty and openness
4.) Financial support
5.) Family commitment
Recognize that God created your spouse with these needs and do everything in your power to fulfill them. Understanding and addressing these fundamental needs creates a harmonious and balanced relationship. For men, fulfilling the desire for sexual intimacy, engaging in shared recreational activities, and appreciating admiration are crucial for feeling valued and connected. Women, on the other hand, often prioritize emotional intimacy through affection and meaningful conversation, alongside the security provided by honesty, financial support, and strong family commitment.
The word family comes from a root word meaning “to serve” or “service.” By acknowledging and respecting these differing priorities, couples can foster a supportive environment where both partners feel appreciated. This service-oriented mindset, rooted in love and mutual respect, aligns with the very essence of the word “family.” Embracing this approach encourages each partner to actively contribute to the relationship, creating a sustainable and fulfilling partnership.
Key Takeaways
In moments of strife, the teachings of forgiveness, patience, and unconditional love serve as anchors, guiding couples back to the core principles that brought them together. The covenant of marriage is not merely a legal or social contract; it is a sacred bond that transcends individual challenges and celebrates a shared journey of spiritual growth. When both individuals dedicate themselves to nurturing this covenant, they create a sanctuary where love can flourish, barriers can be overcome, and enduring happiness can be found.
Clear communication is the master key to healthy relationships. Don’t assume—ask if you don’t understand your partner. Take the time to stop, pause, and pray. Always invite the Holy Spirit to lead and guide every thought and decision. Remember, your wedding is a life event, but your marriage is a lifetime covenant and achievement.
Related Texts: Genesis 2:18,24; Hebrews 13:4; Proverbs 31:10-12; Amos 3:3; 1 Peter 3:1-8; Ephesians 5:22-31; 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
